Discernment Counseling is specifically for couples in which one or both spouses is not sure he or she wants to remain in the relationship. Traditional marital therapy is often not as helpful for couples in this situation because marital therapy is assuming that both spouses are ready and willing to work for change, and that both are at least somewhat hopeful that positive changes are possible. Therefore, we have pursued this training to provide an alternative short-term step for couples prior to a longer term commitment to marital therapy.

Discernment Counseling is a brief (1-5 sessions) therapeutic process focused on providing clarity and confidence for both partners regarding both an understanding of the current state of the marriage and how it got there, as well as options for the direction of the marriage. Most of the time with the therapist is individual due to the fact that spouses are often at different places regarding the relationship. The goal of this process is to allow both partners to explore options of moving forward together or separately with a therapist who has the benefit of information from both parties. In contrast, each spouse pursuing individual counseling at this point in a relationship is often detrimental for both the marriage and each spouse’s ability to understand their own roles in the history and future of the relationship.

Are you unsure how to invite your spouse to attend Discernment Counseling with you? If so, we are able to schedule a single individual session specifically focused on formulating a plan for extending an invitation to your spouse who is expressing a desire to end the marriage.